This weekend I felt inspired to write a few cryptocurrency jokes. Many make fun of the Bitcoin vs Bitcoin Cash branding conflict. If you don’t follow cryptocurrency on Twitter, then many of these won’t make “cents.” I’m not a comedian and haven’t tried writing jokes before, so reader be warned.
My altcoin and your altcoin were sit-tin’ by the fire
My altcoin told your altcoin “I’m gon-na set your Bitcoin on fire”
Talk-in’ ’bout, hey now, hey now; ICO, ICO, all-day…
Bitcoin walks into a restaurant and asks for a fork. Waiter says, “Only if you pay in cash, diamonds, or gold.”
Ethereum walks into a restaurant. Waiter asks, “What will you have?” Ethereum says, “I’m considering Proof of Steak.”
An ASIC, GPU, and CPU walk into a bar and order a beer. Bartender says, “I’m sorry, we don’t serve miners.”
Bitcoin walks into a bar and asks if they accept cash. Bartender says, “Well, that depends on your block size.”
When shareholders asked Nvidia and AMD why there is a scarcity of GPU cards, they said “It’s only a miner problem.”
A blind Satoshi Nakamoto walks into a bar and happens to sit next to Roger Ver. Roger asks Satoshi if he could buy him a beer. When Satoshi asks why, Roger replies, “It’s the least I can do for stealing your vision.”
Bitcoin, Ethereum, and Ripple walk into a bar and order a beer. Bartender says to Bitcoin, “I’m sorry, you must be 21 million or over.”
A good name for a steakhouse: “Proof of Stake.” A good name for a deli: “HODL the Mayo.” A good name for an appetizer: “Buy the dip.”
Bitcoin Cash who?
No thanks, I’m allergic to nuts.
BTFD, FOMO, and HODL walk into a bar. Bartender asks, “Who is designated driver and who is going to get REKT?”
A whale walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he can pay using Bitcoin Cash. The bartender replies, “Only if you plan on getting REKTed.”
To Bcash or not to Bcash, that is the no-coiner question.